A True Friend

A true friend doesn't mislead you.
A true friend doesn't use you out of loneliness. A true friend doesn't spend quality time with you and say there's nothing there.
A true friend doesn't lead you on and make you think your friendship is something else, like it doesn't matter, like they don't care.
A true friend doesn't make you feel special and then one day make you feel like you're not.

A true friend doesn't treat you more than just a friend for almost a year, then tell you you're just a friend.
A true friend doesn't mislead you and use you out of loneliness, just to fill their emptiness.
A true friend tells you how it really is, is honest and true to you and tells you early on in your relationship what you really are.You're special and most especially you're special to God.

Anyone who tells you or treats you any other way doesn't really know how to treat you God's way. They can't treat you more than just a friend and tell you you're just a friend and have it both ways.

A true friend is faithful to the end. A true friend doesn't deceive. A true friend really loves you from the heart. A true friend won't mislead you. A true friend isn't perfect, but a true friend owns his or her own mistakes and doesn't just tell you how they hurt you, ask for your forgiveness and then just sends you on your way,as if everything is okay, as if everything is okay.

A true friend doesn't leave the conversation unresolved.
A true friend doesn't tell you what can hurt you, just to see you drive off.
A true friend doesn't leave it unresolved. A true friend doesn't leave things unresolved.

A true friend runs to you. A true friend runs out to meet you.
A true friend doesn't use you. A true friend doesn't spend time with you, then turns around and tells you, there's nothing there, I didn't care. Don't mean to lead you on and make you think I cared that way.

A true friend doesn't leave it unresolved. A true friend believes the best about you, a true friend fights for the truth, fights for the truth, and never backs down. A true friend doesn't leave you standing there. A true friend tells you the truth and stands by you to the end. A true friend doesn't use you and bruise you.
A true friend is the best news to you. A true friend is honest and doesn't bluff, doesn't cause you think otherwise. A true friend can face you and tell you head on. A true friend won't lose you, cause you're not worth losing. You're special and you're special to God. A true friend doesn't leave things unresolved. A true friend goes after her and tries to reconcile...even if she doesn't believe you anymore.

A true friend doesn't confuse you and then loses you.
A true friend is careful with your heart. A true friend is so careful with your heart. A true friend knows what the Father says about guarding the wellspring of your heart. A true friend protects the wellspring of your heart.

Fall Sky

Its after 5 late afternoon
A breeze blows over me,
rustling, whistling through the winds, through the trees.
The sun begins setting and no room yet for the moon.

I walk to my car slowly.
Flashbacks of childhood days in the sun flood inside of me.
I look up and see the vastness of the sky and changes in the leaves of all the trees.

Time has moved forward. Years have passed.
Time flies like the birds in the sky, like the wings that soar overhead everyday.

Early in the morn, I see the shadows of their wings grace the paths and roads I drive upon, well before the sun rises.My eyes are drawn to the depths of the fall sky.

The fall skies point unto eternity where the past is seen no more.
And the changes of this season remind me of such beauty in tarnished things, because of only one who restores.

M.C. Escher

October Late Afternoon

You paintbrush the skies
Never cease to impress my eyes
I'm so in awe by all you made
Oh how your beauty never fades.

Peaceful late afternoon.
And as I watch the dusk of sun, its so peaceful to my eyes
Angles of light and rays,
Keep beam through the windshield,on my neck and face
Shadows casted all around, its later in the day
Into my eyes your eyes beam and radiate their place

You put my heart at rest
You grace me with your best
I am hushed in solitude
By this Sunday afternoon.

Confidence

It isn't found in me.
Its only found in Thee!
It isn't found in what I can make or create.
It isn't found in how I look, what I wear, where I work, where I am, nor who I will marry or date.
Confidence is found only in Thee, the only One who died for me.


It isn't found in the future, today, nor the past.
Its only found in eternal things that will last.
It isn't found in my strengths, my failures, faults, nor weaknesses
Its only found in His faithfulness, steadfastness, and righteousness.

Confidence is found only in the One who has the power to set me free.
That my friend, spells genuine confidence with a capital C.
Because confidence is found only in Thee, never in me.
Never in two, never in three. Only in one, only in Thee.

Have Thine own way, Lord
Have Thine own way.
You are the Potter, I am the clay.
Mold me and make me ever true.
Have Thine own way, Lord, have Thine own way.

I Still Remember

I still remember when I was five
watching you work hard with your hands in the front yard
You got under the car hood and rolled up your sleeves
I'd sit on the porch, waiting for you
and play with my dolls, eating apples
surrounded by fall leaves

I remember the trees in our yard
Canopies and shadows all around me
Climbing limbs was sometimes hard
And playing outside felt so free

I loved the smell of crayons, broken up pieces, coloing pages
You walked into our house and sat close next to me
You watched me dream on a page, make-believe-me
Its all I remember about the days that were good
its all my heart wants to see

Its the last time my heart felt so alive
Its the last time I felt anything
because the rest I've blocked out.
Looking back, memories of age five are not so old, but new

Piggy back rides and swinging on swings,
sliding down slides
How I miss these times when I was just a kid
and you were my Dad
a friendlier Dad

I never quite understood what went wrong at times, between you and mom.
I knew love could be felt, but not for very long it seems.
Volcanic anger, swinging fists, dad's screaming voice and mom's broken heart
left us all confused,
Then my five year-old heart was wounded and bruised.

I was afraid we would lose our family.
I was afraid I'd lose mom; I was afraid we'd lose you.
I was afraid we'd lose two.
After age five, its all I remember.

I grew up thinking love was a feeling.
Now I'm re-learning a lesson, that love is a choice.
I'm all grown up now,
but frozen inside at age five, trying to make meaning
of all this, and trying to hear my real voice.

Mom often said, "keep it a secret at school"
Dad said ,just stops your tears
I grew up thinking if I shared the family secrets, I'd look like a fool.
and believed this was true for so many years.

Fast forward to thirties,and the pain never vanished
Neither did the unexpressed tears.
I'm starting to remember that emotions tied to this never banish on their own
over time they became mountains of fears.

Its hard re-visiting the past
when all you want is to move on
But real healing, I've heard, doesn't happen so fast
You've gotta feel fully the weight of what went wrong
To know the difference and live right again

I still remember when I was five,
standing in front of our house
Dad and I took a picture together

He got on his knees to stand beside me
and gave me a pink rose flower.
He wrapped his arm around mine.
All I could think was how much my Daddy loved me.
Its a memory I love and still remember.

What is Love?

I could serve with my hands the most neediest man
But if I don't love him even if my hands can't
What is love?

I could share all I own with one who owns none
But even if I did,
If I didn't love them deep inside
What is love?

I could go on a date, and show him all interest in the world,
But if I didn't love most who he really is inside, his heart would shatter and our worlds would not unify but would clash and collide.
Then what is love?

If I didn't love the real man inside, a part from everything else
taking him as he is,and turn the scene around
where he cares most about who I am underneath all this and loves me for me
Then what is love?

Man longs to be loved, where he is loved through and through
Where his struggles are overlooked and the pain of his scars, flaws that marrs his heart,never defines him.
Where is that kind of love, tell me where can it be?

Man longs to be held in the safest arms and man longs to run where his heart can roam free.
Show me the place where this love is found? Where can this kind be?
This all makes me wonder if my heart knows what real love means.
Lord, please help me to know it.
Because I want to know what love is,
I want you to show me. I want to feel what love is.
Lord I need you to show me.